Written by Stan Boardman
Music and Lyrics by Paul McCoy
Friday 8th June 2012
Wag AMusical, written by Stan Boardman and
directed by Pauline Daniels, came to life thanks to an internet hit by
Paul McCoy and Stan Boardman. Its catchy lyric – " I wanna
be a wag, Jimmy Choos and a Gucci bag, 4x4, a Mini and a Jag" –
came as inspiration to the duo for a musical about a checkout girl called
Jane who dreams of marrying a footballer, and whose best friend Mary thinks
it is a brilliant idea, until it happens. Featuring a cast of nine, eight
songs and eight scenes, the cast meander through the storyline, with supermarket
jokes about Jewish cheese (cheeses of Nazareth), dancing bin men singing
about recycling, an over enthusiastic cosmetic surgeon and a gay footballer.
Jane was played by newcomer Helen Massey, who seemed uneasy on the stage,
while the likeable Karen Oliver played her friend Mary and Billy Nelson
played the local lad who becomes a footballer. Nelson’s wonderful
voice caught the audience a little off guard as his range and power stepped
out of character, but showcased how talented a singer he is. David Heath
of X Factor fame played a bin man and a gay
footballer whose only saving grace was a comic one liner to Mary who thinks
he is chatting her up, when, in a very Scouse voice, he argued that she
needs to calm down as he was only going to ask if she had a brother! Suzanne
Collins played Candice, or 'randy Candy' in a role she seemed to relish
but unfortunately bordered on a pantomime dame.
Billed as a fresh new musical I was disappointed, the concept was brilliant
and this could have really soared as a modern musical, but unfortunately
the portrayal failed to reach its potential. The jokes were tired, with
further use of Boardman’s famous 'German who bombed our chippy’
gag from his 2006 World Cup song. It felt thrown together and unpolished
with actors having to change sets between acting. I felt sorry for the
talented singers and actors who did their best with such poor material.
It was never going to be a thought provoking piece, but it could have
been amusing and playful. Unfortunately it was too obvious and as each
old gag rolled out I found I was rolling my eyes and trying to see how
long was left by my watch.
Comment left by brian on 26th June, 2012 at 14:23
excellent! very true! could not believe the press this has been given but finally an honest review that paints a more truthful picture!
Comment left by matthew on 29th June, 2012 at 15:37
is this the Jennifer Keegan from the magazine one voice from a few years back by fisher/keegan? if yes, can you email me please?